you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
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