is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
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