No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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