What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....