Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
