Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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