You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
