also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
do herpes really smell.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Randomize