UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
