If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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