Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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