You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Drunk is not a location!
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
