forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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