Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
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