and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
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Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
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It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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