Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
