If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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