I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
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