Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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