Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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