pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
we made out on top of his cat.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
