You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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