I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
