It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Randomize