Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
My vagina just recognized that song.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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