All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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