I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
