Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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