Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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