If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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