One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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