i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
