I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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