Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
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Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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