never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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