have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Randomize
