Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
