rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
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I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
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I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.