I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Randomize
