I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Randomize
