they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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