im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
