coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Randomize
