Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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