I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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