He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Randomize