My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Randomize
