Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit