If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
So apparently I’m into choking now
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
