i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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