I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
